Danny's Day at the Office

SOAK!

It is pouring rain today. Kind of fun. I asked Dave to take advantage of nature's rinse and give the front fence a wash. Of course, the minute he went out there it turned into a total deluge.

At least the fence looks great and Danny had fun!

Don't ask me why they're shirtless

Sweet Lord.

Maybe their shirts were soaking wet from the water table. Maybe. This happens. Kid gets messy or wet right before dinner. Kid wants to take shirt off and eat. Whatever. Less laundry to clean.

Matt was destroying each piece of spaghetti just like that one. I think I got him right before he had had his fill.

Bonus trampoline photo

And that's why it's good to use some toxic root killer every once in a while

We are probably going to get the boys a trampoline for their birthdays. Not for the fact that it creates an insane amount of static electricity...

I mean an insane amount...

Well, here's the....[toilet explodes]

....temporarily interruption of the story here because as I was writing that post (while Mary was at work), the washing machine was draining water, and due to a build up of roots (along with other materials, ahem) in the pipes running from our house to the sewer line, there was a blockage. And once the water couldn't flow freely to the sewer, it began to flow freely back into the toilet and the tub.

All I hear is a loud splattering. It takes me a moment to realize that the splattering water is not coming from the washing machine but, rather, from the bathroom, so I go to investigate. And there's water and said materials all over the floor, seeping into the hall, and continues to flow rapidly out of the toilet. I run to the washing machine and, in my head at the time, and I swear I am not making this up, hit the 'off' button (complete with insert shot of the button) as if I was in some movie thriller and the 'off' button would stop a nuclear meltdown from occurring.

I return to the bathroom and I let it sink in. The floor is covered with water and debris that you normally don't want lying around on the floor, let alone wanting two young boys from dancing on because they want to have a "puddle party". Oh, yes.

Using a loud, firm voice, I manage to steer them away from the "puddle party" and play with safer toys that will not leave traces of e coli all over them. I take our rug cleaner and detach the brush attachment and begin to vacuum up the water on the floor. I dump the first tank full outside in an undisclosed location. When I come back into the house, Danny is dancing outside of the bathroom door. Not because he wants to go to the puddle party, but because he has to pee. Thank God that's all he had to do. So, I lead him to the back steps and tell him to pee on the ground. Crisis averted.

During the second tank of "water", Matt is trying to wander into the bathroom. I pick him up and notice that his diaper is practically falling off because it is weighed down with a considerable amount of liquid that comes from wearing the same diaper for 14 hours. As I remove his pants, I notice that his legs are a bit dirty. I guess he done soiled his britches approximately 2 hours earlier and no one had noticed. Now, his bottom looks like a stream bed during a drought ravaged summer in which the water is gone and all that is left is a dried, cracked ground. Now, normally, when one has to deal with a disaster like this, one would take the child to the bathtub to clean him. Did I mention that there is residue all over the tub? Yeahhhhhhhh. And I can't take him outside and use the hose because that water is ice cold. So twenty wipes later, Matt is all clean.

I go back in and resume the clean up. Some time during the third tank, I turn around and Dan is waving around the bread knife. And let me tell you from experience, that sucker is sharp. As in, whoops, I done nicked meself OH DEAR LORD STOP THE BLEEDING! He managed to climb onto the counter to grab it and was bringing it to me because he wanted a piece of baguette. He is very cooperative and hands me the knife and I cut him and Matt a couple pieces of bread.

After the fourth tank, I come out of the bathroom to find the boys sitting on the floor on their hands and knees licking bread crumbs off the floor. See, they didn't exactly eat the bread, per se, so much as they tore the bread into tiny little pieces and spread them all over the floor. I set the vacuum cleaner to the Devito position and have Danny clean up the mess himself.

Thankfully, four tanks and the bathmat (which absorbed roughly 5-10 pounds of water) managed to remove the majority of the water. The rest of the water and goods, well, I could wipe up with rags and paper towels. During all the clean up, Mary had made an appointment with a plumber to come at 11am to clear the blockage. We keep the gates locked, but I unlocked the gates so that the plumber could get onto the property. As I am scrubbing the floor, I hear the gate open. I head outside to go talk to the plumber. But, lo, there is no plumber. Although, there is a 23 month old child taking and old-fashion Woody the Dog style "adventure" down the sidewalk (he maybe went about 3 feet).

The plumber eventually shows up, snakes a cable down the pipe and gives the pipes a "haircut" and removes the roots.

(ball is used as size reference...it was not actually in the pipes)

The boys happily ate loquats for the entire hour (thankfully, Danny can peel and pit his own). The pipes are working properly. The tub got cleaned. We went back to a normal day.

And we resume the post.....

So, the boys and I head over to the Garfinkels house to watch the Steelers/Broncos playoff game (yes, this post is a bit dated). The Garfinkels have a trampoline in their yard. The boys (along with Isabella and Blake and Blake's friend) spend a majority of the afternoon on the trampoline. Sure, they climbed up into the treehouse and slid down the slide and played with various robots and cars and gerbils.

But for the most part, they played on the trampoline...

and played...

and played...

Is that Matty making his escape because he is being overwhelmed by all the bigger kids on the trampoline?

No! He went to get his own tube. They were whacking each other with these tubes once the game of "Zombie" (not my idea) got boring.

(pictured: game of "Zombie")

Well, the game ended with a Steeler loss, much to Asher's disappointment. I loaded the boys into the car. It must have been around 6 or 6:30pm. And after some brief chatter, they both fell asleep for the night. I got them home, slapped a fresh diaper on Matt, put Dan in his pajamas, and they went to bed.

In conclusion, a trampoline will wear them out and thus, it must be purchased for Dan's birthday even though he requested the "Bumblebee Game" and a skateboard.

DAAAAAAAVE!!!

So apparently I must yell out "Daaaaaave!!!" when looking for him - like so: